Come witness the prognosticators of the SIEM as we travel through the mysterious 5 Ages of Logging and Security. We will reveal the (likely bleak) future of every InfoSec pro's fave topic, Log Review. Our holy mission is to make you think about log review in a new light, discuss how to make it suck less, and to make you laugh about things that would normally lead to sadness and cutting yourself.

The 5 Ages of Logging:

Anarchistic - There were no logs, the IT world was a dark & chaotic place, which was pretty cool, albeit kinda scary.

Monolithic - There were logs, but no one cared/bothered to look at them. Life was good.

Realistic - There was log review, and it sucked, like really - a lot.

Craptastic - Miraculously SIEM was created, and it sucked too, but slightly less so.

Supercalifuturistic - There will be something ‘better' and it will also suck. And you will pay too much for it from your favorite greedy vendor(s) because your CISO told you to get some of that stuff that is on the cover of <Insert Garbage Industry Rag Here> or he heard about at the IT Managers happy hour at the local sleaze joint…  Why' Come to the talk…

Live onstage [redacted] demo included. You will laugh at least once - or your money back! Satisfaction Guaranteed except where noted, especially Nevada.

BIO: Together, Eggz and Cheez have too many years of experience in InfoSec. Which as you the reader surely know leads to cynicism, bitterness, overuse of sarcastic humor and alcoholism. How they continue to be employed is a mystery.

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